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Friday, December 22, 2017

In completion of 2017.

Dec 19, 2017

dreamt being friend of an English noble family, or Japanese host, ie their 2 boys and only daughter. first the boys showed me their real estate, and traditional kid practices around & in trench of their castle, which so beautiful, with yard and fence, and harvesting field with peasants nearby. I commented British buildings usually round shape while Chinese commodity residential block usually in slice alike. they also showed me their parties. then their only sister returned. the girl likely an artist, she put on me new shirt & introduced me to her party. when I prepared to performance and jumping from 2nd floor balcony to hall ground over awaiting crowd, my alarm woke me up. it's a warm dream, without pressure, esp the daughter cares me so much. this week still in wilder joys aid by alipay virtual credit. I try to prepare an installment with the credit, so I in urgency to spend near ¥1500 so as to mount to 2000 CNY installment. spending upon year end gifts really a breeze. I equipped dearest son a suite of SWAT winter uniform, including coat & pants, pricey ¥350. last night I spend another 120 on family photo book reviewing a decade golden memories, esp in woz's growth. for our domain registrar, godaddy defies the credit, I partially shift some deposit from monthly mobile data plan and spare cash for renewing our remnant 16 domains year end. but mobile fee recharging has limit set by the virtual credit, so I only allowed 400 CNY to transit. however, after these operations, I more confident that 2017 will complete without regret. past week also allows us enjoying benefit of goods, like my kid brother aided me a new Japanese style bed cushion, quite soft & warm & economic efficient, I praise it exceeding word. otherwise each morning esp chiller morning when I get up my bone hurts. our new google home mini first arrived amid our seasonal cyber gifts. it's so beautifully functional, enrich my son's spoken English & informative anytime empowered by the moral uplifting American corporate giant. we spend half hour to setup it, still my son at a loss for he was not left alone to accomplish the task. he wants now to carry independent workload on his own. that remind me how hard my situation can be in a tiny world our economy & social circumstance permits. my kid brother this time generously extended arms to me, likely last time our elder brother loaned me for domain renewal even in his hard time shamed him, and his aid grants us to upgrade our rechargeable batteries stock, which prepares us for more e-gadgets to harness even more wonderful modern living standard. God, dad, reviewing our situation, we felt so much blessed: our beneficence hinders nobody, our broad laugh shadows no one. while most renowned billionaires bow to PRC sinful tyrant, confronted by lawless deprivation and death penalty instead of standing clean, esp IT industry monopolies in rats' race. God dad, our anxious free growth might ceilied esp upon my offspring, but dearest God dad, is there anything we bestowed is not under your Holy Majesty warranty? grant us usual path, and merry heart forever, under shine & shrine. bring me sooner my Royal China, my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for broader future of our 2 nations. in our ancestors' forged link, we stand firmer on the eastern Asia now and then forever.

Dec 12, 2017

these weeks brewing shopping online for quite some times, empowered by alipay virtual credit. but unfortunately godaddy doesn't support it. so I ordered woz's new boot, google home mini as planned in this dawn. later I will buy myself tea whose deficit last months helplessly. In dawn dreamt of a respected elder, likely PRC general Liu Bocheng. he first in my dream appeared as a painter, who drew golden leaves with Chinese traditional calligraphic painting. then he linked 3 painted leaves in a line to forge a brush and drew more in batch likes painting software, painter which can animate painting procedure does. then some relatives of the elder appeared, claimed the renowned man never query the elapse of his old acquaintances, for he can grasp the information in solitude & void. after woke up I felt he must be old partner of Deng Xiaoping, General Liu. these days PRC surveillance turns more rampant, and insanely. last weekend it only deterred playing back & restricted sources available via lagging internet, but last night it shameless rip audio from online episodes real time stream, and reset cache building minutes each after 2 or 3 minutes, just aiming upset my watching experience. hatred in PRC, esp dogs arranged by tyranny let me sad sometimes recently, by their desperate, cheap and total equipped to teeth. nevertheless my son rejoiced after my analyses of adversity we were beset, after he felt insulted by my scorn when he refused counting cash for me when I handover bills to pay our spa groupon in front the counter. might he thought the ammount, ¥250, too small for his engagement, but I hoped he recount before shifting to cashier, for I just roughly fetched from my purse. but he move them directly to cashier with whom I natively didn't trust. my son got hurt and in next Saturday when we went cinema & bought Taiwanese sweet juice he refused to face cashier. I first puzzled by his refusal, blamed him shy to publicity. then I saw his attitude & reason behind. so in Sunday luncheon, I explained why I didn't put him as independent but a kid. we more or less reunited & the downtown hotel restaurant lunch is delicious. after showered & returned to his mom's house, I let him watch "Rick & Morty" while I massaged his feet. his sinful mom tentatively arranged her lesbian friend's son came over for her english tuition, then my son looked diligently to play steam game with the docile kid while his mom, also the cheating kid, posed to be too busy and left my son unfinished amid game playing. its all right God, dad, just let the bitch does her utmost sins trying tearing my son apart between beast & holy, hership vs fathership.
God, dad, 2017 ends soon. grant us renew all 21 domains with bonus, my only source of surplus in bare living year long including boarding & lodging, spa, barber, monthly cinema, weekly dining out with woz, dearest son. grant us self-relying sooner my online portal of Royal China. bring me sooner my Crown Queen, Asoh Yukiko, for future ahead, for tomorrow reality in eastern Asia. protect zhone 21 domains in our title & promising in their far-sight & far reaching game changing. grant us merry Christmas & lunar new year!

Nov 30, 2017

dreamt editing video as my old career in QRRS cable TV. a piece of video abnormal & frequently freezed. I reported to leader that its likely encrypted. my once departmental leader, likely framed me and side watched for my clueless while playing Mahjong with his pals in the studio. but I checked carefully to assure its not damaged but encrypted, then gradually decrypted the video. after that I posted my resignation notice for the unfriend environment in which the boss conjected with departmental leader setup me in. last night I felt sad for our new registrar, dynadot, so irresponsible to fix its problematic dns setting rule. it domain root record defies matched field, say title and value, but just arbitrary single value. while zoho mail hosting SPF and let's encrypt ssl dns verification both need title "@" matching txt value field, otherwise the only txt value wouldn't be recognized, and verification halt to proceed. such a simple malfunction defied many users' operational inc mine, and caused many complains in its user community. but after near 3 months after my transferation from godaddy, I yet saw fix at all. the boss of the company shows his leisure time with his pet dog in his pool on social media. this reminds me their less concerns with their product on which I deeply hope I can firmly cling to, after departed from godaddy which more intelligent and powerful esp dns setting, just in one shortcoming, too expensive & bargain needed in renewal. I hope our new registrar, dynadot, responsible, steady, but new found let the assumption shakeable. God dad, why domain registry so thin in scale of intellectual property, why is it so easy to be a domain registrar with such a problematic product while remains open service? it shakes my faith in American corporate moral, and traditional Chinese, esp from Taiwan, as dynadot founder is a Taiwanese, more equipped with merit of hard working and emotional smarter.
On Tuesday our ordered ssd from taobao arrived. but last mile express, contractor Yuantong express failed to deliver. I buzzed the agent according sms noticement and the man claimed he no longer in the job for days. so I visited local office of the contractor a bus stop away. the small office jammed with parcels. 2 women there helped me find my package after a quarter's scrutiny. Yuantong once had a wonderful service, speedy & well organized, but now seemingly in deconstruction. for its too earlier to fetch my son from his school, I lingered awhile in KFC local franchise, now under PRC native brand. there I found my alipay virtual credit, 花呗, resumes my limit from freeze. I paid a KFC groupon via the payment tool in a blink. that's so exciting even before I went to bed hours later, I still felt shocking satisfaction. I need credit so badly. in next days I wondered what credit is and how it can facilitate my life, I took granted that it only encourages installment. so this month I will equip my son & my own 3 items, woz's new boot, google home mini, and my tea, all in one installment and hopeful year end bonus will pay the bill eventually. God, dad, enlive quality service in American Chinese startup, esp established corporations like dynadot. bring me fruitful usage of credit. bring me my Royal China, my Crown Queen Asoh Yukiko for better management of monetary. grant me constructive credit adoption, and booming business my online portal empowers.

Nov 27, 2017

retrospect last week, it elapsed so peaceful. but in fact I burning for the coming salary which turned out extraordinarily surprising. previously I thought the year end most financially demanding tasks completed with 2 loans from my old hometown relatives, ie my sisters & brother. but suddenly my vpn service informed me renewal due in couple days, exactly Nov 22. while recently my salary released usually on 19th monthly. so I took it easily. from 19th, Sunday, I looked out hopefully descending of salary till 22rd, Wednesday. everyday I prayed for solution. it was a sunny noon on 22rd Nov, 2017, I gave up canteen lunch and hope my last salvage. but it didn't. then I sought out with blessing resolution for dorm canteen's loan. they didn't refuse my appeal, offer ¥1000 at once. with it I immediately deposited in my icbc credit account. CCP surveillance blocked my trading attempts for a quarter, then went smoothly. my paypal strangely refused my payment, claiming verification failure. so I ditched it and paid via alipay, a mainstream electronic financial tool in PRC. my vpn vendor listed under its transaction log in alipay. might be that's what PRC surveillance demands in defying of my paypal which done last year perfectly. then most wanted salary release notification sms arrived: with year end bonus, I got 4420 CNY. I had previously doubted many times my budget & salary supporting gap, and thought I will save my purchase from returning less to bank credit, which already warned me insufficient pay back & possible sue over me. the main coming bill is my son's desktop os, ubuntu on a ssd usb drive, and gift sending to my nephew whose first child, a daughter just born. I had already refrained from gifting his wedding ceremony nearly year ago. so this time my congratulation really due to manifest. they both costs ¥300. with the powerful salary, I maintained last month pay back standard, 500 CNY each for ccb & psbc credit debt, while clear all my due liability among bills active in life, except debt to canteen loan adds more hundreds. but in the afternoon, when I handed over ¥1700 including 200 to pay a woman staff there for my laundry, the canteen operative woman and her husband accepted without complains. God, dad, what a wonderful moment after so many neck breaking anticipation! in the night I informed my son online the clearance of bills and claimed only left unfinished is donation annually to poor kids in China mountainous area, and bbn bible radio. but now, I want more: equipping my son woz a pair of new winter shoes to replace his wrecked one, and my tea deficit for months. my son's programming lesson arranged by his mom stepping in, my preparing his desktop environment is portable os on ssd udisk hopefully running on hardware of his old dell notebook and intel nuc in his lounge. dad God, let my son adopt my suggestion, first step to master typing via training tools from chrome store on his chromebook. grant me helpful and his prompt execution for remaining aid from powerful google & online courseware. I have almost no more debt in his education, nor in my online business, our portal for Royal China and democracy of China progressive. God dad, grant me another surge of spacious budget for renew our domains year end, nearly 15 domains left. grant us happier lunar new year, and Christmas 2017. thx for this clueless post in firm hint of publish in rest of recent elation.

Thursday, November 09, 2017

once stress now hilarity

Nov 9, 2017

dreamt of a podcasting event. the host likely recent hot leaker, Guo wengui (@KwokMiles), who revealed lots of dark scandals of CCP high ranks. the first version was cancelled and the Guo decided to remake. a new van pulled in, likely as an award for the publish, but its tire is half empty. I among other volunteers push the van to podcasting stage. I also handle the microphone, wire connection, recording etc. yesterday really overwhelmingly elated. a planned event aid by my elder brother realized: renew woz's dearest domain, woz.fm for 2 more years now that migration to new registrar who support 4 years ahead to subscribe. our first registrar, godaddy forbidden more than a year to renew the domain, so every year I was anxious about it, and last year I actually paid more for the domain after it entered recovery mode strangely before expire date. also, the domain under icann's administrative increases price $25 since next month. so I badly want to save the ¥500 before new renewal charge complies. I never thought I would raise money from my hometown relatives who mostly live average lives. but God know its OK. my kid brother who has a small mill & bought 2 large houses, dishonored me bitchily each time I ask for loan, did same lest my another aid request. but my 2nd elder brother, my childhood main adversity and in recent years whose contribution to our old family, esp his favorite fishing skill brought more colorful meals in our old family times, warmed my heart and turned me into gratitude, and started to appreciate his loneliness & self-efficacy. this time he touched by my cause & urged my kid brother leased the loan from his own proxy, even his family was not so wealthy to loan me. God dad, now I gained loans from both my sisters and brothers, each ¥1200. 2017 designated to be blessing, like yesterday's shallow snow here. God dad, grant me growing our fortitude against harsher siege PRC surveillance setup us. let my ancestor's gift and needed support reach us in time coming years. let copycat tyrant missing in frustration. bring holy glories shinily on earth. bring me Royal China and my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko to broaden my life entrenched so far here from limelight & sufficiency.

Nov 2, 2017

this post designated to be brief: I just want to report my satisfaction yesterday and today. yesterday I blogged without dream's escort and narration went smooth. this dawn I dreamt my temporary habitat in a remote place, say northwestern China. I managed a lot and barely got aboard, on train or airline, to Harbin, my current provincial capital. near last stop I found my destiny far from Harbin where almost half China apart from central China, my hometown. so intensive triumph turned half completed in fact & overestimated, I didn't regret but knew new journey ahead homecoming. then I woke up from vivid dawn surreal. yesterday I posted among boring, pale reality without nutritious dream. I contented with my work and avoid lunch. dining time I felt rewarding, and all female local people I concern shown in daily jog refreshing outside around QRRS square. their kindness leaves me supplement to complacency. after settled in dorm and TV time began, my kodi under heavy surveillance. search result of my favorite episode appeared but playing back abrupt quit before rolling up. still I harvested via youtube which much readier accessible. I learned current world affairs, some situation in China first hand there unmistakable. I also enabled gzip on my web server for speedier page load, after google reports test result on my site performance via gmail promotion. that's really nice to boost my site for greater audience. I have no other means to improve our voice, Royal China's emerging gospel, for world and our people beside this tiny technology. God dad, I really enchanted by podcasts' companion all day long during deadly siege by PRC tyranny, thx for the commodity, grant us freedom of voice & informative stream on base of poverty prevails mainland China with dying surge of ghost communism. bring me sooner my Royal China to broaden national. bring our Christmas day gift on time and cure our need of support of our living as well as investment in cyberspace. bring me sooner my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, to extend my life folded so many years alone. dad God, let me resilient as usual.

Nov 1, 2017

Its a sunny golden autumn morning. in the week I hardly in detailed dream, but still I felt so blessed. internet in PRC tightened much since the ccp congress. ai powered surveillance periodically disabled my internet upon triggered key word or something other incurred self-posed punishment. it can be dozen times in an hour. quite boring and spiteful. in the beginning of last week I almost thought I will be idle totally, but then on Wednesday I saw tasks: reinforce zhone dynamic sites with ssl from let's encrypt, a website promotes ssl worldwide with its free certificates issued more than thousands hundred copies. dabbog.com backend webapp also need update after near 2 weeks delay since its official update. I contacted godaddy hosting but the support crew made it clear that as a main upgrade godaddy will free itself responsibility but let my alone to do the update lest failure of lost. I loathed to join security tasks for I lack hacker experience and IT security training. after a day scrutinized the operational I launched near dinner time to upgrade my site, and smoothly done in an hour. it really cheers me up with new confidence in server management. next day I prepare ssl upgrade. I previously thought cert installation is the core problem, but soon I was detained by domain ownership verification hours. for one of my registrar's dns strangely didn't support root level text record, I have to single out a domain under the registrar for single certificate. then I got my first let's encrypt cert installed for 3 domains verified by dns txt record. cost some more time google web server's .htaccess hacking not to block file upload to server for verification, the another ownership of verification method adopted smoothly and 2nd let's encrypt cert installed. both likely least cost while my option one is server extension installation which has more impacts on linux os. its really marvelous to see zhone sites' ssl green & formally. since my first website on google cloud my ssl which is self-signed, never independent without malware's precaution and more click through before homepage load out. I also spend little more time to rip off http source of header & footer images to ensure full site ssl. in the weekend, ie Sunday, I demonstrated my work narrowly done in Saturday to my son, woz. my site traffic also booming recently, thanks God and faith we beholding. now its another Wednesday aimlessly, God dad, bless us with some engagements. bring me sooner my Royal China, and my Crown Queen Asoh Yukiko, for family & homage. grant us year end bonus to sustain my small investment online, and our business never so prominent in China history.

Oct 21, 2017

dreamt enter university again. the day is opening school day. I with other enrolled youth led to our school and dorm. through scenery natural hill, we passed through crowd parents to get seat in our campus. lately I carried my son explained to crowd what's philosophy in my view and why I study in university gain. my anxiety of dorm wet and over jammed disappeared at destiny chamber and I won friendship from alumni, includes alumna. my explanation turned like public speech, by which even myself moved. yesterday is salary day. I got ¥3060, 200 less than last month. even so, I arranged my monthly reunite my son in my dorm after cinema. transfering 4 domains from godaddy to dynadot almost done. dynadot home website online chat did wonderful support work. after 4 or 5 contacts including with godaddy support via land phone, I informed by dynadot crew that .io since 2017 July refuse in its whois database stores registrant information. so my long time dissatisfaction with godaddy for its hiding my registrant info with .io sponsor organization is not their fault but limitation of newly incursion. in review my smooth transfer I left positive comment on godaddy facebook page praising their gracious service. the comment arose comments at once. some of them questioned if I was godaddy's post bot. last night I read an article how insane Chinese parents flattered their kids' teacher mischief in their teacher and parent social circle via wechat, a PRC mainstream social app, and despise other parents' lawful requests for their kid's privilege like mobile not be seizure by school authority, bargain for favor of teacher. most poor Chinese just too feeble & coerced confronting organizations. that's why when I contact service providers in cyberspace I prone to be thankful even they are within my privilege: I am afraid to be punished for dispute with legal person. that reminds me long time in PRC society legal person stamp on nature person in lawless reality in socialism, and why PRC Chinese made their society a hell of institutional crime swarm: indifferent bureaucracy, warded gangster groups behaviors, shameless prey, brutal bully, hate & cry for others' transparency esp free media of voices. these characters all led to tyranny, like most mid-east countries where poorest & most violent led civilian only option, to exile. most PRC Chinese want to be a leader in an organization, for costless or at least cost efficient gains, just try to manipulate a puppet & behind curtain. and most forceful puppet is national army, largest dog or monster the tyrant invent to rein constitutionally, at cost of national surrender and sacrifice. that's the reasonable consequence of a society prefers superman/trojan horse, ie legal person to nature human. I at first thought I got the hidden truth about Chinese failure, and its cure, Capitalism, but then I saw more insane is extinguish of free speech/express, freedom of media, death of publicity. that also led me to review President Trump's efforts to blame American media. I first time felt dubious upon Trump's intention, esp my hero, former President G.W Bush recently criticize Trump, too, even undebatable Trump's self-discipline of American, and America first, both holy strategy I believe in.
God dad, PRC stepping into new Empire. but tyrant lacks qualification to put him up for throne, like what happens in Russian shows, even the small bitch trying getting his new turn of Presidency, relentlessly. nobody except holy chosen leads to Crown. that's China future political landscape. thx dad God, bring me sooner my Royal China, with my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, with new territory we vested.

Oct 13, 2017

dreamt at hometown saw my kid brother had affair with a new bride whose husband's name same as mine in the village. he is an adopted son of a couple lately had their own younger son. in half nap I heard water heat system just water pumped in this season first time against chill and made sound inside channel. then I dream my kid brother bathed with the girl together in our old family's natural earth heat spring tube. the adulterous bride is granddaughter of the only woman whose most life is introducing half wizard religion with her tool of fate-telling in the village. my passed mother first attracted by the far neighbor then introduced to my dad, who since then more closer to faith and treated the old woman friendly in his late life till elapse. the old woman's surname is Mao, the same as PRC legendary leader. she never had a child and a life time smoker which quite strange among villager women. the bride father is also adopted by the old woman whose shrank husband also in surname Zhu as the founder of the village Zhudajiu, once prince of Founder & Emperor of Ming Dynasty. my kid brother introduced I had 2 other options to bath in the village. one is my aunt's homemade, another far from village near the village's dam & fountain. I hardly settled in man-powered bath tube in my aunt house. my youngest elder sister helped me to heat the water and chat with me. I just put off most of my lower part clothes but remained my chest covered in the scenario, squatted in bath tube before the water warmed up when later my cousins, ie my aunt's children, returned & gossiped around. I just felt awfully inconvenient with rural water heat system esp bath tube in dream likes old time rural toilet, maokeng or shit pit. in the last week I almost settled transferring out 4 domains from godaddy to dynadot. at first my son's domain, woz.fm, refuse display transfer authentication code. contacted godaddy then it fixed. then zho.io stuck in missing whois information and new platform can't find my email to send me initiating verification email to start transferring. I phone called godaddy 3 times barely explained my problem by my poor English. next day the hard initiative procedure rolling into track. that's all wonders I experienced after empowered by my hometown relatives' aid, and wonderful American gift of discount of my web presence cost, near ¥1200. the whole week in unease and relief of awesome of resolving. dad God, last to settle domain will arrive next Tuesday. help us clinch it unshakably. the whole week I felt unreal with the gain. now launch me in new land of adventure lest outpaced. God dad, in long run, let my investment on domain & our web presence weightless financially, burden free while rampant accessory as civilian in western democratic market nations. let us harvest in content and purposefully resourceful. in the week I review lots of my passed life, what my life means to others, including my son and my people in PRC. I hope my free of routine job while remains productive and self-rely. Dad God, bring me sooner my Royal China to carry mission longer. bring me sooner my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for better homing. thx for this golden autumn morning, dad.

Sunday, October 08, 2017

in threat of domain lost, rejoy on new platform, dynadot

Oct 8, 2017

dreamt with my son woz hangout computer market which located in narrow deep lanes. just after we find a set of converter for video or something, came 2 vendors bragged their new product which has a larger capacity than ours. but we didn't give up, and gradually retreated from the place. last night a drizzle turned clear with rhythm in my dream where I at first thought the sound of dripping is ants' eating dry wood, a scenario frequents my children hometown memories. today is my birthday and I will visit my son weekly after PRC boring national day & lunar mid-autumn day holiday, in which my once and long term workplace, QRRS, left me empty hand of seasonal bonus. I badly need the highly anticipated bonus to renew my domains but... But that penniless didn't fail us, with aid from my sisters at hometown instead. my sinful kid brother, who been a small workshop owner in southern China and acclaimed millionaire, turned off my request of cash in for efficiency & currency with my sisters' loan promised, so did my niece in Wuhan, central China. both cold shoulders with liars superficially polite. my nephew, who operates retail shop on taobao.com, the largest e-commercial portal in PRC, and a promising young man, 1st son of my 3rd elder sister, at first also delayed handing over the loan. but I fatally need the loan at once for something active in boring holiday I can engaged with. so I burst in air with my sister and her husband who casually gathering for his son's new house settled in eastern China. in minutes the loan arrives after my nephew avoids family shame and trouble possible from PRC secret surveillance over me & trenchs me in short & misery. with it I successfully launched transferring some of our most dearest domains to a new registrar who charges less. the saving is obvious: once ¥1200 only afford to renew a single domain, woz.fm at previous service provider, now covers our 4 domains among most priced after switched SP. God, dad, in shrinking PRC doomed economy, and daunting insane starvation casted upon my life on my vested land of China and eastern Asia by CCP PRC, I will support my domains ownership from my food savings, & life support together. we will fight for survival with our domains wholly, never broke. last night I adjust my budget on buxfer.com to forecast my monthly bill in resolution. Dad God, domain renewal crisis seemingly short time passed, but we looking for once and all solution to be independent with the intelligent property, like average civilian's normal possess in a middle wellbeing nation, burdenless. Dad God, in this blessing drizzle morning, I look forward more clearance of debt in year end 2017, and fresh starter of 2018 in new meaningful agenda. bring me sooner my Royal China with my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, with starting finance. bring solider China domestic affair against tyrant upon glooming world war 3rd.

Sep 26, 2017

dreamt at hometown in lunar Spring festival. my eldest cousin's 1st son and my 2nd elder brother's 1st son sit on my shoulders each, and soon my passed mother or other relatives, say my niece found my ears full of dirt, esp peanuts and dusts. they help pull huge long chain of this kind of sticky things inc peanuts, shells etc. I didn't blamed the 2 kids but I don't know why them fooled me. these 2 kids long time been used by their parents trying to challenge me, esp my growth via state education system. in the end, I noticed a half finished new house at outer of the village, on western part near the mountain. I was told it was my aunt, ie the jammed my ear kid's grandma, and her only daughter who already had 2 or 3 children but still under strict influence of her always cursing mother. I felt distressed for they doomed in hatred of my grand dad's family & our glories. It's a sunny morning. but I still felt chilly indoor. dad God, I need ¥1200 to renew my son woz.fm domain, which is due and only accepts annually renewal, no more several years' preorder like other usual domain. its a pain for me not only for its the dearest domain we have but also most tending demands. Dad God, in recent years there was seemingly less and less year end bonus which my main source of income to support my domains' renewal. now my 21 domain annual renewal prices near ¥5000, while the bonus seemingly shrinking. I previously thought the society as well as per capita income will increase decade by decade, but now I saw sterner scenario in which monetary surplus drained gradually. the people and society turning poorer every year. dad God, I still believe development of society, civilian's consumable income increasing, and consumable commodities including domain and websites with richer options as social welfare. but now, God dad, I felt harsher burden to afford our 21 adorable domains. grant us booming business and my biz self-relying. guarantee our domains' ownership over period when it matters to us. God dad, bring me sooner my Royal China to put things right up. bring my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for better management of financial affair. in this lonely PRC holiday put joys in my solitary in dorm. last night the wall near window of my dorm again cracked and shed some ashes & blocks, it turning a dangerous house. save me from the dumping, shift me into comfortable & gracious shelter, even astonishing my new family in new settlement. dad God, put faith in me for brighter future, and my promised Empire never hurries.

Sep 25, 2017

dreamt at an airport with my son, woz. I designed a heading clip for a competition event, but woz insisted adding his work onto it. I dislike the idea and warned woz we otherwise will lose the competition. this salary day full of joyes even there is no surprise in its amount. I paid usual bills and still arranged 2 dining out with woz inc one for his neighbor pal. debt to bankcomm finally cleared. now I looking forward a new credit card or credit limit in my current card resumes to its before late payment, both just for guarantee our adorable domains never fall into expired due invalid payment method. God, dad, Bank of China had refute my application last week. help me gain a work around for the deficit of credit. last week also sees woz monthly visit his dad's dorm after settled his salary. we ordered meal and ate them in dorm as woz likes. woz had his favor snack in the night and watched videos online. next morning we ate KFC breakfast. on Sunday we haunted a downtown hotel's canteen we recently frequented, and satisfied by its cuisine again. then we went public spa for shower. I told my son how I need a credit to avoid dependence upon the QRRS Dorm canteen operative woman, and how misshaped current business of zhone in fact possibly saves us from PRC seizure in messy dominating and lawlessness. woz promised to try to keep ownership over our 21 domains in his future. when he started homework as his mom arranged, I tried a new video game on steam platform. after felt boring and sleepy my son urged me to leave and I followed. I lingered in my dorm till this morning breakfast. God, dad, this weekend I will gather my son and his neighbor pal dining out. grant us a enjoyable dinner and happy time in the event. grant me anxious free PRC national holiday meals, esp another dining out with barbecued mutton with my son. grant us a working credit for domain renewal ready, and small bills capable esp in USD. thx dad, in this morning sunshine among trees' branches, and weightless blogging after weeks halt.

Sep 11, 2017

dreamt my aunt held party of our relatives at her house with my mom. most relatives chose cards to play but I reluctant to join. then some boys went fishing nearby. I still wandering. then they got some fishes. yesterday I dreamt funeral workers secret skill to search corpses for valuable items like gold or jewellery. on sea I with my son discussed with those kind of craftsmen, trying retrieve properties my ancestor left us. then dreamt my ancestor, Emperor and Founder of Ming dynasty, Zhu Yuanzhang, who busy with writing his empire civil law on his own. he treated me peacefully, and his looking was not so ugly as some PRC history books claimed. last week I first time practiced meal limit: I starved 2 lunches in 2 series days. the reason first likely for canteen operator woman not so welcomes me. then I felt ate too much next meal after the teeth cleanse operation. so I adopted fast and intended skip a meal every week now on, including 2 meals in 2 weekends which already executed months. yesterday also first day I felt so painful after implies new scheme visiting my son: once a week. in Saturday otherwise I will reunite my son, but I lonely stayed in my dorm, tasteless online. my dorm internet warded again all the week. and my son's chromecast strangely malfunctional. in God bliss I reset it and setup it working again. I urged my son makes well use of ward free web, esp spoken English and left him alone with his android games just after drizzle & public shower. the Formosa franchise restores service last Sunday, but hardly any changes after near 1 month "refurnish". I guess its in its wade now, like PRC does toward all foreign companies. a nearby hotel's kitchen where we haunt during the refurnish period let us missing its pure Chinese cuisine. and we didn't visit Islamic noodle restaurants for half year, nor Islamic pies, even cheaper there. God, this breakfast in canteen I ate more than usual, for last night I felt hungry. the background music and the adorable woman, the operative of the canteen, let me regret, for they both out of my reach and non-enjoyable. God dad, save me from temptation and useless emotional riot. put me in sole praying for my future family. help those longing get theirs. bring me sooner my Royal China, my Japanese Crown Queen Asoh Yukiko, to my new reality. grant us independent business online and offline prosperous in hundred decades. bring my son more chance of meaningful and joyful.

Wednesday, September 06, 2017

timed killing as sanctum precaution.



Sep 6, 2017

dreamt of bring my son traveling to my hometown. in suburb of our current town, passing a hotel we met many witches and wizards. some ambushed us. some cursed us. some stealed us. some transfered our appearance. in first attack, my son lost his outdoor baggage in a blink. second attack turned my son a disabled kid with damaged arms, lost his 2 mobiles I prepared 2 years ago. my son later told me he hide them in a place intact. we were heading to a bus stop where we will travel to Tianjin, north China where I graduated and broke my heart for a girl collegian. in Tianjin we will switch a bus then reach its railway station and head to our hometown in central China. in homeless and changing fake idol, we held each other firm against misleading exerted by those dark power. sometimes I want blamed my son according his performance but I later gave up, for they were forged and fake. some witch attempted to trade or threat, and attacked after our refusal. its a frightening dream. my neck turns more stiff and painful after nap. last night I ate too much, esp snack from street vendor near dorm gate and got sore water in throat midnight after woke up abrupt. I so gave up breakfast in canteen, and just napped. there were so many hatred in area of QRRS that I really felt. for example, the day before yesterday, a pile of dog shit or feces laid exactly front entrance of the dorm gate which using fence to narrow route. I after dinner and routine dusk jog started and in a blink stepped onto it through the limited outlet. the night a middle size rain cleanse the dirty road. then in last dusk another small plastic bag in which likely bloods and dirts held laid there, pits the road block. a stubborn freak in his 60 or 70 constantly challenges me on my way jogging in dusk. twice the sin copied and according my changed route around the QRRS square just to facing me and deface my innocence. God grants my killing over the rubbish, the enemies of zhone Royal China. its a sunny noon now. I sunburn after lunch in the dorm minigarden, till nearby Senior middle school students came canteen for lunch. its very brilliant during recent clouds and rains. God dad, you guide me so far I didn't make any change around me. you tells me my security intact so far for future more widespread slaughter. yes dad God, I remember and trying remember the betray and profanation of my Royal China. grant me lighter heart for enjoying my daily bread and social times. bring me my Japanese Crown Queen, Asoh Yukiko, for better future of felling PRC, failing Chinese on mainland. guarantee our spiritual uprising on Christian way. thx dad God.

Sep 5, 2017

dreamt with a Russian scholar visited Bill Gates' futuristic house. Bill at first introduce his encyclopedia. then his wife treated us dinner. his daughter also appeared. while lingering I studied my subjects. yesterday I in my life first time received dental health care: teeth cleaning. it's a small local clinic, which charged me ¥80, dearer than most web q/a. but the girl likely a deputy doctor worked diligently and careful. the second half operative did by another woman likely a doctor and a bit harsher. uncomfortable in the procedure ignorable but time spent endures matters. I spent near 1 hour, even when I left I felt relived. its my 1st step adopting western lifestyle in grace and managed. last Sunday afternoon I arranged woz monthly cinema. I waited him from his music class half hour in Qiqihar supermarket. the nearby guard of the market even doubting my task while I using my mobile to read there but no communication in air. after my son gloriously appeared, I presented him ice drink, movie "Dunkirk", and hotpot before taxied home. its wonderfully planned and executed in a pack. but the night I slept so deep that next morning I felt clueless and unclear when I visited my son for shower in public spa. his computer locked him out after too many logon failure due to the problematic mouse. so I spent another half day to reinstall windows. his mom, the small bitch, tentatively brought him out and lingered somewhere lately after 7pm when I left the house after settle all issues fixed. I wanted to report to my son my achievement and confidential but unable. my son also forgot bringing his mobile in usual hurry with his domineer mom. returned to dorm, I doubt if I carried frustration and tasteless after my son under expectation so many times putting me in despicable. but I decided to care my son full heart. so I buzzed him online and introduce my finished work and blamed him for dispensable mobile, which blocked my access instant and let me felt inferior to his mom hijacking him with superficial educational purposed activities. PRC government like a cheap teacher monopolies education and all time pretending orthodox draining otherwise creative initiatives. God dad, break through the fake idol, free my Chinese society from lifeless stagnant. bring me my Royal China, and my Crown Queen Asoh Yukiko from Japan, for humanizing social flesh and architecture. grant me sustaining my adorable domains with meaningful future world mapping.

Sep 1, 2017

first dreamt a veteran politician intended to make me a mayor. I then follows a group municipal bureaucracy to a mine field in city hall. we each hunted for diamond, golds, etc. then dreamt I was an entrepreneur. our product is astronomical components. then dreamt a group tourists visiting my elder brother's house. they likely helped my brother for his celebration of event with their colorful performance show. after they all left marching I left to blog in dream but delayed and unable settle. my youngest elder sister and my 3nd nephew accompanied me at home. when the guests came back, we and friends of my elder brother grouped into 2 delegations to compete with dart or shooting. my son attracted many audiences with his adorable when the party went hot. its a sunny morning while I napped most of mornings in the week. last night is strange: I recklessly tried to protect the dorm canteen after noticed likely mafia threatened and extracted custody fee. recently in at least 3 occasions I saw hooligans lingering in dorm canteen, superficially peacefully occupied seats with fewer orders but just wasted time unusually late. that's threat of troubles. last dusk I brought the canteen another water melon from street vendor and let canteen workers prepared some for me to eat. there were only another guy in the dorm there for dinner, and a 3 middle aged men group there detaining with few orders. I felt glad with my melon and soon left. in my room I reviewed the scenario and perceived the canteen operating family's under bully. so I re-visit there and saw only their kid and their father left accompanied the lingering pests. I loudly talked with the old father and angers left me left abrupt. in half hour I visited the canteen 3rd time. the 3 hooligans left in dark dusk with heavy bags each. I urged the father if they had problem they should contact QRRS authority but he shown skepticism. in the night I review my situation with rotten PRC society under shadow of world largest mafia, CCP, dogs tyranny. God, sooner or later your faith holder will be attested against sins and swan song of warlord, world communism esp inflated PRC. instil us with strength of faithful. shift us from dangers of brutal accusation. bring me sooner my Royal China, and Asoh Yukiko, my Crown Queen from Japan, to enhance my life span. bring me stable investment reward for constant growth in business. thx dad, for the peace and hope.

Aug 25, 2017

napped since morning and dropped lunch. dreamt in earlier era with my elder brother vivid and his pals trading & discussing startup a company. I with my son interested in accounting and attempted to work for them in its early phrase and brought some innovative ideas. then dreamt in marching army. when the army at rest during raining, we tried to cross some units seeking for shower. in a jammed barrack girl and boy Scouts trade their items. I offered a sd card to trade, likely with my son's companion, at least 5 or more items from different traders gathered in front for exchange, including cards and other gadgets. most of the pals so friendly that we glad there for a drifting living. I woke up at noon when sunny outside. last night my son told me his Junior school life started with army training camp as prewarm. that explained why the night before yesterday he slept before 8 pm when I buzzed in. on his face some appear some hard thorns, as on his arm, that aroused my notice during our video chat online. he might frustrated. I also soon to search web for what it is. God, dad, we trust your mercy. then I regretted my unease would cause my son's overreaction with burden. I watched some embarrassing human bodies videos on youtube, and fragile of healthy body taught me lessons. I long time afraid of virus and that worsened when I napped. I unease with my pillow, one of them cheap quality and some dirty spots appeared even disgusting blackened. I felt my neck itching but I know mostly it's fake response. dad God, in siege of zhone's enemies, we naturally alert upon poisons, insanities and profanations. God, last dusk I saw separating us from common wealth of Zhong society attempts, threaten me of baseless includes my current comparable stable life with economic income. God dad, my ancestor left me resourceful and basic supportive standard allowing my innovative upgrade to breakthrough stagnant smothers Chinese society in hundred decades in failing sanity. that's my mission in this era. grant us freedom of starvation, brutal labor, motionless, and shoulder me on resilient of Zhong in relations. dad God, promise me the value of my workload.

Tuesday, August 22, 2017

message & revenge arriving endless shinny.

Aug 22, 2017

This morning napped on chair before breakfast and delayed and avoided breakfast in dorm canteen. I dreamt long time secret chaser of my dad's voiceless life coach: the husband of my mom's close friend, also her niece under surname, Hu, and Mei (plum in Chinese). the Mei over decades been cadre of his village and executed CCP planned parenting sternly but he indeed bred more than 6 children, mostly after my last brother's birth years later, contrary to the policy targets powerless family, just attempted to copy and overwrote my dad's glories. I have sibling of 6, that's long time the source of relentless hatred of the chaser of my dad as moral director. he sent his first son to CCP army in western China and always boasted bribery army leader with local feather food, via long distance parcel express. when my dad passed, the village cadre first hand attended my dad's funeral and on air joined my phone call, told me I needn't return to see my dad's bury, after my mom's dubious mourning voice in the phone some twenty hours after my dad left us. he chased my dad hard and attracted most of my old family, sometimes includes me, by his cordiality. he must uncomfortable in front of my dad, his brilliant hero, or mirror of his sinful, his life's propose. yesterday long time waited salary released. no more and no less ¥3227. within half hour I dispatched and solved it. I managed paid credit debt less to spare to pay more local debtee, dorm canteen operator who claimed in urgent expenditure. I didn't know if they satisfied for when I went to return money, they absent and his helping dad there accepted. God dad, I tending asking my kid brother to loan me to buy this month medicines. he long time attracted by the cadre relative, and envied my dad's glories. he even hated me under God's shine. in my first call back after my dad's passed by, he talked to me and seemingly hardly hide his relief. now he cover my boarding, ¥700 *13 yearly and hated cost even a dime more for my hard credit debt crisis. he took over all my credit cards and then told me he lost all of them. dad God, copycat or hidden enemies, graceless cheap souls, why it hurts us, dad, for they humiliate us? manifest me more on creativeness and sin of stealth. God, dad, my startup, zhone publication online bundled with 21 adorable domains, likely starts its life from my self-proving out of my asylum trap. I never expected that, burning alert after broken heart for girl collegian, or sleepless nights. my world ruined after the record of the stain. I told my son's mom when I left the asylum 3rd time after she hijacked me with her sinful mother in my son's infancy with which God smashed me again against thickest dark PRC plots sabotage/crucifies our naive Royal China, and claimed my only job since then would be my blog, my murmur of my meaningful universe. now it all brought about. and enemies of zhone feared. dad God, let justice and revenge in time to wash me, cleanse my glory of dents and dusts. dad, even I don't promise killings, I do promise righteous weightless baptism.

Aug 19, 2017

this is a sunny morning. I put my quilt outside for sunburn, while since workload I preparing for coming salary. this month I borrowed near ¥800 from dorm canteen. and the operative woman urged me to return my debt more for they are in urgency to make use of it. I tried once to contact my elder sister for aid but so far didn't connect successfully. last Wednesday after I made full backup of zhone publication online, I walked to visit my son midnight, in pains of not attend him so long in my solitary, against risk of unhealthy tendency the dark world trying assert on him. my son calm heard my fear and soundly chose maintain our current life unchanged, except my purposed new weekend reunion once a week, from 2 visits weekly. its the first new routine in place and now I still penniless. in the week the dorm lan administrative attempted to bring down my vpn and in 2 days I barely surfing freedom web. so I prepared for harshed surveillance, installing windows client which more robust and workable as new hub of connectivities. God, dad, I'm in such a pitiful situation that I totally under your mercy. help us and ensure our ward free web. this week passed smoothly, lest my bothering of looking out for my son's presence, except now when I waiting for financial support to fetch him for monthly reunion in my dorm. dad God, sinking PRC step by step tighten rein over overseas purchase, among which my domain investment endangered for our registrar chosen godaddy against PRC's lawless tyrant seizure. now they put alipay and tenpay, Chinese most domineer online payment tools, under its account, not only for monetary profit but also for its political advantage. my 21 domain renewal also heavier burden in shrinking civilian income nowadays PRC. dad, whatever is its fate with my namespace accompanies me decade, I choose abide with your putting me on the holy road of commitment and joys. dad God, 2017 summer now turns drier and crisp, golden moment in northeastern China under siberia. God dad, my job and agenda fulfilled so well that I linger here with thankfulness. guide me with larger target and brighter goal in time for achievement brought out by our endeavors already, esp by my son, woz's. in weeks he will step into his junior middle school. in less promising PRC education system, what I can expect him out of rat race among cheap young Chinese? dad God, cater to him, Hope of China, to expertise of academy and physical skills. his video game skill quite considerable adequate, while his eyesight suffers. protect him from aimless and tasteless. thx, Father.

Aug 9, 2017

dreamt among my old family in my hometown gathering. my youngest elder sister told me my nephew, ie. my passed eldest sister's first son, least person in my relatives capable of academy, also improving English by learning from his foreign clients, aside my eldest brother's son who almost mastered English in his self-employed work in southern China. my nephew previously almost a hooligan in local factory. now he owned a small business and totally self-taught English and MBA, while the other nephew graduated from a common college and contacting English during promoting his uncle, my younger brother's company website, faezrland.net, and engaged in sharpening it in career. I astonished by relation between my old family and English, likely since my passed dad once worked under invading Japanese army occupied our mountain and demanded labor for kitchen fire. In dream I felt urgency to boost my son's English skill sooner, with blessing tools we now had esp fenceless web. today is my 2nd day employing new routine which seeking avoid sleepiness in morning by offering free morning nap instead. previously I arranged reading news in morning but mostly very sleepy and miserable in buffeting mind exhaust. now I shift rss reading to noon after lunch. after breakfast I just turning on radio and shifted myself to bed as will. my job now mostly concerning reading, watching, ie. informative process. quality of sober time matters more than quantity of time available, so I afford more napping and rest before jumping into work space. God, recent kodi brings so many qualified source of video and audio online, I felt so rich on our stock of information. promise us the viable of our ward free web, shift our focus from method of acquiring to quality of intelligence on which we enjoyed and worked so much. dad God, coming weekend my purse is empty while I try hard to prepare my son, woz, monthly cinema experience in his boring summer vacation. aid us toward the goal. drift our hard time in sinking PRC economy to new phrase of enjoyable staying alive or survival. bring my investment rewarding. bring me my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for better management of my Royal China. thank you, Father.

Aug 5, 2017

first dreamt likely before graduation when we visited a temple. I got vision that wisdom like underground water resource, connected among different lakes and pools below. I talked with a nun and saw complicated world view. then we packaging for leave the campus after graduation. Xiao Jindong, my lower berth schoolmate committed suicide in his 30s' for poverty and jobless after graduate and constrained lived on land of his old parents in rural, intended to sent his package via railway and his own traveled among common travelers. I liked traveling with my schoolmates and trying persuade Xiao join us for companions. after nearly a week drizzles, it now left cloudy. yesterday my kid brother buzzed in after near a month after I scorned him for his mean and comtempt to me, refusing loan me ¥200 for raspberry pi, he approached for affirming that I still boarding in dorm canteen, and pay due to the small business after months delay. I guessed there must be some good news there in his life, otherwise he wouldn't be so generous. for penniless I again begged canteen woman for loan to support my dining out my son weekends. she in surprise and asked me to turn in on Saturday when I asked her in Friday lunch. last Wednesday godaddy hosting support team buzzed me for my site infected by malware, I called back and talked twice with them. a man then a female staff received my call online. we talked about half hour, roughly made my claim heard that I was helpless and trust them to deal with possible intrusion and aftermath fixation, all with my poor English. next day my infected web app, forum at http://bbs.zhuson.com , updated to newest version when its due according the app's official blog a month ago but strangely untouched and vulnerable in most July. I doubt why godaddy lost control so long but still I trusted them till this outbreak led them to fix. now with sounder update, I felt much securer and relaxed.
after returned to bed, dream still in family gathering. I persuade some pals among my relatives to loan me, telling them about my investment, esp 21 domains, and booming future.
2017 summer in Qiqihar, northeastern China brings quite some cloudy days and rains. here QRRS Dorm in morning drizzle and wet houses. here the canteen view.

Thursday, August 03, 2017

moisture fuels hopes in summer 2018

Aug 3, 2017

dreamt in army or in army training camp. in break my schoolmates asked me to write them a song for talent show but I really in brewing. a quick shooter schoolmate already wrote a song which exaggerate those propagated emotions. when schoolmates trusted my comments, I went straight and dislike promoting normal feelings to sanity. but without show to entertainment those who admire you, can be really embarrassing. this week drizzled a lot. my quilt turns wet indoor. I continued to make well usage of my new raspberry pi. but buggy rtandroid made a hell experience with lagging and frequent exit and halts. I spent half day to realize its cheap toy and shouldn't put more load onto it. isn't its independent running os satisfying? isn't it hardware essentially for handy computing a real alternative? I found the fact in huge relief and started to enjoy our dear kodi in the night. then I can't help innovative re-config via command lines rather than GUI to spare nvram on my router for better performance. when all done and went to bed, I doubt how much it worthies while a dearer product will have much ample nvram not to considerate again and again. is my job cheap or funny? or I just educated? this morning when I launched to spare nvram on my router via escaping GUI saving settings, I even mistaken network down. I had to visit dorm lan administrator for help. the woman in charge of surveillance cold shoulders to me and I finally found my fault in setting. near 11 pm my target archived and I called it a day with bliss. while I busy with my todo, some of my environment turned hostile to me. the dorm canteen woman tentatively shown her despise. women in dusk jog also reserved for my appreciation. I'm getting old and they shame of my humble and empty promise. many secret plots against me among hooligans around. God dad, I didn't see my farewell show and nobody deserves to probe. dad God, I was contented with my life here with hopes and distresses. bring me sooner my Royal China with my prosperous offspring. bring Asoh Yukiko, my Crown Queen from Japan, for our better life and enjoyable harmony in daily arrangement. without Japan, without China in future world of economic and sustainable while gracious.

Jul 29, 2017

dreamt invited my son, woz and his mom to go cinema. his mom in anger and after movie abrupt brought my son with her horse left. I had to endure aftermath the reckless woman's rage, find my horse and in dusk search for boarding. in my aunt, passed years ago without notified me, in her husband village I find a mid-aged villager in his yard offering help. he accompanied us find my aunt's house, which is usual half empty and sedative. we talked about my family, esp my passed eldest sister who committed suicide in her prime and helped me a lot, her 2 children, her son and her daughter and my obligation and concerns. then I decided to visit possible home my son and his mom might might settled. on way my niece passed by us and offered some sweet famous local feature snack to us. I likely with my son with whom I felt so warm in heart. I recall and chat my son how I liked the feature food and each time never enough in my childhood. its warm pastime of the dream. its a late sleep till near noon for my relax after the week. I'm now penniless while hours late I will visit my son and bring him dining out. last Wednesday I again worked overnight, to settle 2 raspberry pi 3 before my additional case ordered on taobao arrives, and backup os images before put into usage. the week spent in understanding raspberry pi os availability before making our choice to adopt ubuntu, libreelec, and android. in the process I learned more and sharpened my linux skill, esp after 2 failures accidentally deleted home folder with hidden mounted external disks and ruined plugged usb devices most. I had to rebuild ubuntu and multi-bootable disks in the devastation. rebuilding rewards: new os ran smoothly installing gapps on my raspberry pi android, against disk space shortage previously frequent me and failed my many saving efforts. after almost thoroughly perceived the situation of the raspberry pi world and community, I closed my solution and brought it to see my son on Friday afternoon, after felt boring and sleepy in enjoying online stream our lovable kodi brings. woz arranged practicing e-piano at home and glad seeing his dad. in the vengeful small woman, son's mom's bully and scorn I arranged my son familiar with his new toy, including new os on it, and my own setup lunar calendar on his 2 android phones for informative lunar weather for the soon lapsing summer 2017. my son immersed in new experience of kodi os, linux terminal mode. in the exciting meeting, my sleepiness evapored and energy fills me with meaningful fullness. I settled like a bean. as to my raspberry pi's android, I likely left some remnant bugs to fix, but I will cop it with conquering reign and leisure. God dad, this morning dream really strange and surreal. bring me sooner my new family when I enliven with it. bring my crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for our vested territory on eastern Asia, for our people and homeland. dad God, grant us affordable cinema experience this month and next around woz's new school term, which his start year in Junior middle school. grant us to visit Walmart local market with adequate purse capacity. we enjoyed the sale giant trustworthy so much!

Jul 21, 2017

dreamt in my hometown in a camp. first our village under huge refurnish for tourism. my dearest passed dad, mom, both appeared in dream. there was a town hall just under my dad's old house and in a row of houses there was performance and performers from nearby villagers. there were herd of visitors. then found I was in a travel delegation, in which quite some photographers members, inc girls. we managed to lift ourselves via a lever to higher level. in our team there was a girl film fan closely collaborated with me and we almost led to friend. my sinful elder cousin of my uncle's family, who worked for government long time, again in his separation and kept aside from our villager's ongoing emerging new business. its a sleepy morning. I felt sad why I recently so sleepy in the morning, which so irresistible, arbitrarily and concludes without delay. that reminds me my 2nd elder brother's habit in which he can sleep anytime and any occasions in minutes when spared. I long time wondering why he behaves so, and now the same symptom likely happens on me. and I more and more saw boring's power overwhelmingly stops a working mind. Just now a cop called in for my PSBC credit debt. he urged me to call him back but I wouldn't. God dad, they don't wait another 2 month when I will clear bankcomm's debt and starts to return ccb and psbc's. as to recent works, its quite fruitful. my ordering woz a raspberry pi 3 leads me to research other oses like ubuntu, libreelec, rt-android, etc. the linux based home media center, libreelec at once attracted me, as I was in process equipping my son a better living experience including TV and other entertainment. sooner after found it working to provide reliable source of online stream, I deployed it onto my desktop wintel, chromebox, and raspberry pi. with knowledge of online community and powerful google, I soon turned my chromebox into dual booting chromeos and libreelec, cheap but viable. my nephew, ie elder son of my youngest elder sister, loaned me ¥230 to buy raspberry pi for my son, but refused me another order 2 days later to update air drier powders against wet dorm near toilet I laid on taobao.com. so I turned appeal to my niece, ie first child of my eldest brother, his daughter, for loan to buy myself another raspberry pi. it succeeded with some trifle exchange of view over credibility of PRC's software mostly shamelessly preying its user base. and this month salary barely satisfying, near ¥3300. I mistakenly paid back ccb instead of bankcomm to whom there is a debt under ¥2500 and can be cleared at max 2 months within. last dusk jog I review my lingering naps and saw my wondering dream of a new family, a real family of my own in which I authorized, catered to my relatives. God, dad, bring me sooner my Royal China to support my new family. bring my girls into new reality shapes new eastern Asia. grant me free of debt and joy of living.

Jul 12, 2017

summer 2017 turns much milder after many small rains. and my room window again gathers lots of bugs. yesterday I delivered our first raspberry pi 3 to my son, woz for his study. we managed install it. after 2 failures due to file system format misconfig, we boot it up with noobs 4 on tf card formatted by my chromebook. in the harsh process debug, we amateur damaged a 16GB tfcard and had to use his 32GB tfcard for his portable boombox instead. such a elation after saw raspberry pi interface! after let it downloading Rispbian I left it to my son and arranged he sit in front of TV and returned to my dorm. a thunderstorm just left and air outside freshly crisp. last week boosted by improved salary, we ordered several inspiring goods online, inc 2 seat cover made of cooler materials for summer, a backup vpn router, and raspberry pi 3. my own have an order for replacing used air drier powder made in Japan in my QRRS dorm, 3rd time replacement order with the same vendor on taobao.com. my credit debt near clearance to bankcomm.com after this month, and my total credit debt to other 2 banks mounts below ¥40000, a great relief for me. in this regard, I more and more thinking my long term ownership over zhone 21 domains I cherished so much and indispensable. I also saw decades hereafter my life and investment and intelligent property registered. God dad, put me anxious free upon stealthy CCP and robbing vicious human population competition pressure. promise me my vested Royal garden and shadow of trees and plants, song of birds and bees. this dawn dreamt a lot about prominent global topics, which now in evaporation. last night I in deep content after watched episode on amazon, for faith and pride. God dad, I'm in no one's enemy when I in holy bliss. target me in your future mission all world gathering bravery. if cheap souls can't discipline themselves, the chosen does. let America acts and makes adjustment at will, like Trump did for US, graciously and arbitrarily as whole family as vocation. dad God, people nation and shrine of Holy lending its way. grant me the breakthrough toward new land and territory that renew our old oath and blood bond in eastern Asia. God, bring me sooner my Royal China and Asoh Yukiko, my crown Queen from Japan. lives me another child and a family here.
 Regalbum China

Saturday, July 01, 2017

out of curtained chase, covert inflicting adversity.

Jul 1, 2017

dreamt of training of Royal member, ie. noble court and Prince himself. how his attitude toward his servants, esp 3 closest counselors/secretaries, can affect the quality of leadership. saw philosophy in ruled social interactive or code of eloquent. then dreamt with my wife treated in a banquet, with social skill just learned in train. last week's shopping online, a backup router Asus RT-N66u, finally ruined by PRC surveillance. the express, STO.com, totally denied the parcel it serving, just as taobao's logistics. the poor vendor kindly promised me to check why the parcel missing or went wrong, but after 1 day he rebuffed my call and prompt refund me instead, likely unspoken shame of PRC secret cop's hassle intimates him, seals his mouth from disclose iron curtain. with the money returned, I at once ordered another from different vendor now that the market is full of the product. within the day, around 4pm, the vendor sms informed me parcel dispatched. God, dad, how I glad to hear that! yesterday after read news that squareup.com offers in account credit service, I decided to give it a try. but when I trying signup the wonderful website, my internet worsen and inaccessible for 3 hours. I finally gave up and shut down computer. PRC dog likely warns me that even with most powerful network hardware, they still interceptive in my internet traffic, or blocks my financial connection with American service. however, after dinner and a thunderstorm, I smoothly claimed 2 zhone accounts with squareup.com and its affiliate, cash.me . without US SSN number most services out of my reach, esp highly expected in account virtual credit, or deposit in site, but still the wonderful service from the same founder of twitter.com, generously offers us 2 vanity url, https://cash.me/$faezrland and https://cash.me/$zuocenter . I can't be more proud of the operation out of distress of surveillance. in the week I also modified 2 online resource of google sites' widgets, both of google photo's, to fit my online brand, and deployed onto my portal. visit them on http://www.be21zh.org/regalbum . hope the author grants my reusing his code in xml file that show my google albums' rss source. and I honestly pray google sites, now confronted by google new sites, doesn't elapse into disappear. zhone assets based on the service remarkable hugely sustain. God, dad, this month I merely left ¥100, grant us a happy weekends with my son, woz, Hope of China. bring sooner my crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for better management of my vested Empire of China. bring me my second child as namespace billingzhu.com prepares, and his locked facebook account into using. with adequate financial support, dad, God, I live anxious free in this eccentric city for future open and welcoming eastern Asia.

Jun 27, 2017

dreamt near lunar spring festival at my hometown. saw changes in the village: newly built dam control gate and road. the road near dam gate left with deep and steep wheel dents due to insufficient budget for concrete. I saw our village field, flowers and leisure villagers among it. In dream I married my niece, ie. second daughter, the tallest in her sibling of my mom's niece in a village around. but we were divorced soon in dream and our son left me sad for the changing life. last week full of joyes with improved salary. my urgent bills wrote off by it. now with ¥200 loaned by dorm canteen I will visit asylum for medicine today. my backup cellphone, an old moto, hacked and ill behaved, so I deleted critical database on it immediately. it usually disabled both wifi and bluetooth, nor sim card in it. so likely hacker with direct control on it. I wondering if the facing door, a secret cop surveillances me since weeks ago, stealth into my room and injected it malware. my parcel from ordering used router for vpn on taobao.com, delayed a week still it only left one logistic information: dispatched by vendor a week ago, and nothing else happened in other 6 following days so far. another item, a usb card reader, its logistic information also hijacked several days till it reached locally before updated on time. PRC close surveillance sometimes made me sad. the facing door dog, with all its momentum after just settled, half open his door all day and night, unshakable anonymously fixed my door which was tight and sometimes my son in monthly visit even can't push open on his own, likely in weekends when I left to visit my son 3 bus stops away, just under corridor webcams' monitoring evidently and lawlessly. now that my broken door too loose to hold close breeze, I intended directly lock it down after I enter, distant from any spy around in guise superficial sharing privacy any more. the facing cop also in recent days gave up letting its door half open to peek and eavesdrop. my cold shoulders toward his posed free community but just surveillance from which he earns his dog life, likely conveys strong dislike and ruins his fool's joys and presumable fake poise. he also likely partially completed his mission: stolen my password keeper's database, infected my portable devices with trojans and keyloggers, licked my floor with its dripping messy tongue. the long challenge for a clean os out of controlled and poisoned environment in PRC's hooligan nation really drains me, let me feel boring and labored. what's laughable is that, the neighbor tall dog, once pretending cough every day and spitted everywhere in excuse of his illness, these days silently stay unnoticedly astray, quit both domineering and his condemn the tidiness of dorm public space. CCP authority has its power just upon those cheap souls and zombies which label price of manipulation. dad God, save me from fatigue of faith in long run. bring me sooner my Royal China to discipline China and Chinese under holy. remove trifle divided with merciless by forcible authority and in glory of united one. God dad, bring me sooner my crown Queen, Asoh Yukiko, from Japan, for coming age. bring me more offspring to sustain the 1109 years life of my Empire of China under title Zhu's. bring me lighter credit debt in coming months.

Jun 22, 2017

gradually people around me turns better treating me. my gaze when I jog in dusk turns some women and girls friend to me but also gathers hatred. reviewing women in my life so far, I sometimes touched by kindness and grace of QRRS Dorm canteen woman who operating the small business with her diligent husband. his husband is a tall pal, his kindness to his wife is enviable. these days I likely overdo my kindness to them, and easier led to misunderstanding. I always remember first time I met the spouse when their business just open, how the woman confident and contented. I then felt I can help her with her target, wellness & independence. now about 7 years passed I didn't miss it. sometimes love recalls my campus life, esp master degree seeking period when I met Asoh Yukiko. God blesses me with brave heart, whole vision and all those memories so timeless cherished. I don't want to hurt anyone, but the canteen woman's husband likely taking, for his less gifted, for his property appreciated. God, fix my poised with due humility. yesterday I gained a bonus from QRRS, my once and long time employer, just after a day my salary released, which increases near ¥500. the bonus addes another ¥500. with it I renew my godaddy hosting plan for another half year immediately. also renew billingzhu.com a year. with improved salary I ordered backup router from taobao.com, as incredible satisfying and enzymes me in super confident mood. 2 days passed I still felt the content. yesterday I also retouch my homemade gadget on google sites, which now tending to ban such hosting function and my in time usage likely saves me extra cost from google's wonderful and generous free service. see them on most of our zhone portals homepage, in section of blog rss feeds and tweets, youtube, groups, donation links. its nice feeling, for even I never master scripting skill still I probing those scripts and tailored them into my buildups. I gain so much from my education, my ability to self-taught. dad, God, bring me sooner my Crown Queen, Asoh Yukiko, and my Empire of China for larger comfort in my life, for fulfilling the proud creator life experience. grant us a happy monthly reunion 2 days later, and monthly cinema and walmart shopping in a pack with dearest son, woz.

Jun 19, 2017

Its a sunny morning, I felt obliged to get up and do something. Recent testing tomato router script put me in a worker’s mindset, absolutely nothing else beyond task memories. I dived so hard that I merely recognize other things than occupied by inch in inch progress I strode outward chaos and no effect. My son last Saturday lost his desktop logon confidential, So I taught him to reinstall windows 10 and roughly customizing before backup to image. He reluctant but worked with me, while his sinful mom, a cheap junior school teacher, close watching my tutorial on computer. She occupied her house every free hours out of work, grasps dirty money from tuitions she ought to offered on job. After 3 years and graduated and then 2 decades, she every more than 12 hours in a day earning from the educational bits even it's shabby in quality in her college. I more and more felt its insane. My son due entertainment ruined for his mom’s house forever a craft hut for his mom and her cheap pupils. In this view, I recently relentlessly equip my son with lounge TV and English programs, on which he enjoys and absorbs when his visits monthly my dorm and on my seat. I hope the moment he enjoys staying with me and my workspace forever prolonged. So last month I equipped him a touchpad k/m combo for convenience of remote input on pc and android TV. The Chinese product works smart even we anxious about keylogger and other spy wares lawless PRC breeds, in favor of dog CCP and state surveillance. My son more or less accepted my arrangement, promoting him from mobile games he excels now and adopting more language and expressive method as his new skill to master. I times and times urged him makes fair use of our borderless web. I hope he enjoys meanings in American culture stocked in amazon prime video and youtube, vimeo sites. My trustworthy video education, defied me in youth decades, pacifies me more than 2 hours daily, broaden my worldview and wishfulness so much that I have to put on forth my son, for his beneficial social experience and nutritional source of moral and spiritual. God, dad, my life so rich that I’m constantly complacent. Bring my son meaningful in his scope of activities. Bring me sooner my Royal China to protect her from poverty grilling the land and souls only left after CCP and PRC. Bring producing capacity our fatherland sustains before the burning out in cheap dealer like communism. Bring me sooner my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for unfinished mission we beset, among a never seen silver proud heaven on eastern Asia. Thx you, dad God.
Regalbum China
a newly budding tree in QRRS Dorm where the Son, benzrad, praying and sustains.

source: Regalbum China at zhone family album, Royal moments

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

threats of robbing in poverty infused PRC by CCP dog.

Jun 13, 2017

a relaxing dream in which I visited my artist friends in Tianjin art college. at first I dreamt with BianQiong, my Tibet painter friend, and his friend. they live in dorm like a family. then shifted to a house near gate and some of those students there working and chatting. I using English with a friend from my hometown neighbor county, who is humble and treated me well during my visited BianQiong in vacation, so the moment didn't paid him enough attentions but kindness felt. he sometimes mixed with my impression on another guy in the art college who also attracted me with his able attitude. we chatted in English but my English seemingly not fluent enough and sometimes the students there in the house perceived it. its a peaceful dream and I without any pressure but enjoy staying. last 2 weeks I too busy to blog. my son's nexus 6 lost after forgot to fetch after sporting, likely accompanied by his sinful intrusive mom, a really small woman and poor gifted junior teacher. but next day she registered the lost on local stadium administrative and it returned intact. I even disappointed by my son's loose management and bad habit, but ready to accept the misfortune. my son really glad to regain his nexus, he hummed upstairs when I waiting him in Sunday visit after the sad news. last week I under heavy government sponsored hacking, detained my downloading windows 10 creator edition iso. I also tried to rebuild router OS after disastrous intrusion. I failed times and times to make configurations backup. later I gave up backup now that if I left most of router profile default then will be less shortage of ram and lagging response. we also elated with new auto-connecting script and localized vpn server script, a byproduct huge finding during googling our problems. it fix our pains on ass of vpn connection which frequented by PRC surveillance and problematic and time-consuming. its really a great achievement saves. as though most of the weeks busy and fruitful, PRC surveillance turns freakier now. my facing dorm moved in some young beasts, one with stylish pig tail on his head, staying all day indoor gabbled. most nights when I went to toilet and back, their door left opener and room light turned down, like a sinister black eye hole peeking, just remind me their capable of surveillance, poisoning, and stealth. that sometimes made me unease, but I know who is more unbalanced and revengeful. I put my fate in holy bliss. let thieves trying rob me in day time and in shadows. CCP and PRC literally makes everyone poorer day by day, minute by minute. its a burning fire heap that destroys any surplus in Chinese society. God, bring me sooner my Royal China. bring me my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for better management of my life, of my Empire of China from my heroic ancestor. bring us surprise in this month salary day.

May 28, 2017

dreamt in a journey and next day we will return. I designed a multimedia and have to change some text in it. I tried many ways then found have to install then hack text string, one for title, one for calculation result. then in a class there are some guests. a black child played with my son and slammed my son's face. I angry with my son and urged him to slam back. then the black dad join the war and forced me to pay more attention and compensation. that's likely concerns about my son's English tutor his sinful mom arranged under a black man's lecture in her college, Qiqihar Univ, where she still felt romantic or fantasy. yesterday google alphago, AI powered chess rebot, beat all human Chinese go players. back to bed, dream continue about the lost. I saw some collegians lived around, like QRRS dorm stuffed by young blue-collar workers. I tried asking if they saw my suitcase. no one listened in their games. one of them likely my once QRRS colleague in tech department, Chen Ziming, who left QRRS for better career prospective decade ago, later told me alone that I too risky to put my baggage outside of door and packed valued items inside. I should pay for my careless. its a long morning and my late dream echos turbulent wind outside of window. last night my stomach painful midnight and I had to get up to shit twice to relieve the uncomfort. the dorm canteen's operator, the husband of the woman, turned hostile to me. the marching team in dusk around QRRS square also hated me, just like I didn't appreciate their noisy boombox and coarse taste of music, too. young workers esp close neighbored in the dorm long time grudged with me, trying all means to upset me, to hurt me. the dangers in mop sometimes put me in chill. but I have nothing but mission. coming lunar dragon boat holiday let me so lonely, like the Chinese girl Yang shuping lectured in her graduation ceremony in US aroused so many blind hates in sinking PRC young dogs, exactly her plain true thankful emotion toward American years educated her. dog PRC hated anything out of its humility. they turning China more and more mirror of bankrupted MidEast, purest poverty, now that they never care anything in the world out of their mouths, or their teeths' tearing and grinding, world of mere prey. God, dad, bring me sooner my vested Empire from my grand ancestor, for harmony Chinese family and life. bring me soone my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for sanity of nowadays Chinese society. bring me more offspring for future 1109 years my new Empire of China reset for span timespace. grant us a merry holiday, esp woz's last children holiday coming less than a week.

May 22, 2017

dreamt at my hometown with my old family who all catering a new baby whose centered likely my son. lots of relatives jammed in the bedroom once my old parents prepared for their first next generation's wedding, my 2nd brother's. I held the infant and sending him sleep but in a blink I only holding blanket while the baby missing. then on the edge of bed and edge of the entrance of the room, on uneven stone or plastic teeth of a plate the infant sleeping. his head left on bare rugged without clothes cushion but thank God its OK. we carefully shift him to new infant bed. my 2nd elder brother's wife, their first son, my 3rd elder sister esp helpful in caring relatives crowd. the infant under so many attentions that I felt he must be my newly born son. in second view during a break I thought he might be my brother's 2nd son's first son. the nephew married a neighbor village girl then soon divorced. he now rumored dislikes woman and kept single, that's his mother claimed about her own son in front of me in our latest hometown tour. I think he more likes his grandpa than his elder brother, who had 3 children now, and merits belongs to be our family members but not a clue in his mom who bold and shameless feminism, like generous, honest, integrity, kind, etc. I told him my appreciation in once QQ chat session decade ago when he still a boy. today is Monday morning. I again in chill felt boring and napped. yesterday I bought my son small fishes and shrimps from an elder amateur vendor who is lonely and hopeless aside the road where I went alone to buy fruits. I intended to do him a favor but he refused aid. so I bought his all he charged ¥15, a small heap small fishes and a small heap of shrimps. I left him a peach and 2 CNY extra and fled to evade the elder's defying. I told my son how small fishes with small hot pepper can be delicious for in my teenage my 2nd elder brother quite sometimes bring home the food material after his school, ie. he caught fishes in pond or rice fields after school hours. it left me life long appetite. I really hope my son find the delicacy but so far I unable to contact him on the phone about the dish the grandma loathed to prepare with before I left in Sunday dusk. I also bought my son extra fruits, including litchi and mango, peach, for my son loathed to let me buy fruits after showered in public bathroom. I feed him with litchi and mango before left him alone in his android games. we really enjoyed the fruits. on Wednesday I will fetch his birthday cake ordered online, and celebrate his 13 birthday together ( woz 12 birthday reported here). God dad, I recently felt more solider to accept de facto that my offspring limits to one son. I trust Holy arrangement and humble of my son's mother family, her insanity. God dad, grant me more children in my prime time. bring me sooner my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko. link our nations, our blood bond on new land that shared among us. bring more laugh and companions in my life in family forever hospitable and bright.
BTW, these days media reveals misery of pangolins which extincting after sinful PRC Chinese insane appetite, God, dad, pl save the adorable animal, which is key to remain rampant ants lair everywhere those years under control. let's bee and pangolin forever happily enjoy the planet as we do. God dad, pl!

May 21, 2017

dreamt with ample details after migrated into US. an elder Chinese woman with her spouse contacted me for rent her house or living matters in America. yesterday I happily dispatched salary and sliced it into feeding small bills due monthly, ie. laundry, groupon for salon, spa, dining out. woz's birthday celebration also booked. local debtee received partial return. God dad, grant me next month reserves for my hosting plan renewal on godaddy. this week also somewhat busy. I napped on Monday morning after found jobless and exhausted after joys of reunited son the day before. Tuesday morning I restored, found I can add feedback form onto my google sites. then I launched to learn google form, component of Gsuite, to enrich my website's interactivity. my long time afraid of form and script in microsoft office suite cured by google form's easy to use. in an hour I built up my survey for my google sites and published, inc checkbox, multi-choice, rate, scale, dropdown, pictures etc lots of elements of interactive. google form's response analysis amazingly rich, in pie chart, bar chart, and lots of charts that's easy understanding while informative first impression. Friday I rebuilt my portable os on a retired ssd, after failed to fix ubuntu's lingering error. this time I made the bootable images more cleaner and handier. in woz's monthly visit my dorm, I demonstrated him my websites' new element, survey. and we enjoyed snack routinely, and hot water washing feet powered by dorm's heater just recovered from broke down. dorm canteen loaned me ¥100, but God knows how we satisfied in our companion and companion of hard times. God dad, my living so far designated to deal with a salary ¥3000/month, how real during hopes and joys in dealing with the only source of income. God dad, how I endear my life within this tiny time space here and now on the planet and before climate disaster, while we stride into big chances never seen holy grants. bring me sooner my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, and my vested Empire of China, and our future new land of north and water peculiar cold sweet. grant my cyberspace startup booming in business and influential of public mind. thx for my new summer pants with mobile pockets my nephew offered free weeks ago in my hard time.

Friday, May 26, 2017

woz taller now 12 years.

May 25th no doubt a sunny day, in the cloudy week. but since the morning I felt gloomy. I looking for it to reunite my son so much that sores. before heading to fetch birthday cake I trying complete remnant work concerning my future 2nd child, billing zhu's facebook account, which disabled by facebook cluelessly, the freaky dominant social network more and more likes a giant monster. I then claimed another fb account under id billingzh , and added it to admin of facebook page, billinzh. that morning before my work starts, the internet is dead. buzzed the dorm director who confirmed that fiber optic cable damaged by ongoing refurnish in 3rd dorm of QRRS dorm. waiting awhile I yet can't access vpn so I open my compute stick which has builtin vpn under windows. then I found the mini computer frequently automatically shutdown. later probe found likely usb power insufficiency is the cause. in first frustration I tried to reinstall windows 10 now that a month passed yet it can't get its creator edition upgrade, lest intrusion of malware. then found my downloaded iso image months ago broken, failed to install. likely sinking PRC surveillance intervened my download. for time limit I left rebuilding open and took bus to fetch woz's birthday cake booked online in the early week. I obviously felt failed on bus even didn't figure out why. in the cake store I mandated to show groupon code but my vpn on android phone failed to open shared sms logbook on gdocs and last ten minutes before settled. I tried to tease a young girl in the shop, claiming last 2 years when I fetched cake there was only a female, now 2 boys and 2 girls there so it must be prosperous. the girl don't understand but politely responded. on bus to woz's house, I more or less in peace. out of his elemental school the grandma also there fetching him, but soon left. my son in shabby white shirt and told me he just in performance within 20 kids performed e-piano for celebrating some event. and the weekends also shifted to next day, ie Monday will be Sunday agenda and so on. I just can't in ritual mood. arrived his mom's house, I arranged woz to setup birthday cake and shot for publishment. woz also less elated like last year's birthday with cake. when I asked him his plan for future, he again claimed want to travel, aside higher school exam score. that both failed me. exam score less important to me, an entrepreneur prospect of future my son, either, and travel with his sinful mom just too risky and reckless. and he previously claimed he want less travels after last 2017 lunar spring festival hometown tour. he must lured by his desperate mom who sought escape all times. he didn't eat much birthday cake I bought, which likely bigger and dearer than last year's. I also felt no mood to taste the delicacy, and soon left there. on way to return my dorm, I first thought It was just a case to refrain myself from indulging dwelling with my son weekends. I can suffer and that's all. woz can enjoy light heart everywhere and anytime. in dorm I published event photos and videos and more turned peaceful. then I gradually saw sins and risks in my son's spiteful mom's death journey. my son shouldn't take the bait to sink, by the weight of his mom's dirty tuitions she gathered in shameless home hours from preying PRC cheap parents. I sms my son lately around 10pm and told him my thoughts upon the undue consumer commodity harmful for a kid, for its his dying mom's entertainment, meaningless and drainful. in the next morning I napped all the morning, gathering courage to cope my loneliness and self-supportive. I decide to live up with my sites, zhone portal, for holy commitment and longest prelude of my 1109 years life of China Empire inherited from my ancestor, from my dad, God in Heaven now, for my son and my offspring still at large in their idle times ample and anxious free. God dad, I pray for strength and luminance inside for glow and growth. I pray holy mercy for the aging and solitary in molding my kingdom and generations. Dad God, I saw so many meanings in comparing Mideast and Eastern Asia, and life's withering and blossoming and their mountain difference. let me put it under lightment. let my mission more prominent, Dad God.