dear God, isn't today a special day? I decided to reblog my life on my
website. yesterday I tried to persuade my son to restore his computers
to working status, for that I had visited his house when he schooling
with 2 bootable installation udisks for windows and linux. but he
refused again, recently he more frequently disrespects me, seemingly
he enrolled by prodigy high school locally boost his pomposity, while
my recent ailment, ie. painful fingers and wrest, disappointed him.
his mom, a small sinister woman, now fetching him every dusk after
schooling, a way to tighten her rein over the naive kid. I scorned him
3 times in the phone but he refused to retreat. this morning i cursed
him again, trying layout his inevitable biding my prevailing earth
power, but he yet forgave. on noon, i busy with updating my websites'
ssl and the result let me relaxed and I buzzed him again, intending
ease my anger but he hanged outside with his pal. his short mom
cunning as usual refused my suggestion to fix her notebooks in a
bundle of reuniting occasion during coming PRC national holiday even
in fact she badly needs the fixation. that occurred during my daily
jogging at noon, in the long solitude, I saw severe long halt between
my intimacy with my son, war before my proving myself with new family
and new son, a long promised i shared with my son. this last 2 years'
absence, I tried to evade failing PRC's surveillance, the damned dorm
room's chill and wet let my bone malfunctions, after 2 months painful
fingers and swelling foot, now I almost see light of tunnel as holy
guides. but I really don't know how to seek a new family now that I
saw more and more aging on my body. I admit it's a core issue to my
life and my self-esteem, and my son's wish.
dear God, now, here I'm. I treated myself fruits, oranges and bananas
from nearby newly opened grocery. I marked today as spiritual and
praying new stage ahead. God dad, bring me my new family sooner, and
my new infant. reunite my son with me in glory.
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