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Tuesday, May 27, 2008

it turn out to be sandstorm

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the rain continued till early afternoon. i rode to the little restaurant near the dorm of QRRS through the rain. i ate necks of chicken at a favorite price of 5 rmb. returned to office the sky soon turned dark yellow. even the rain likely brought down lots of sand, it still cover the most of sky and let the range of sight greatly shortened. i read in the afternoon, including reviewed my posts published just before i was sent to my home town asylum. i saw the fight in my brain, against adversity and animosity. i sensed the cry for God. later i felt sore on my neck and shoulders. so i took a break. i felt better when i lower my head. after the guy facing me left, i used his ip to make use of proxy, to trying find out urls of my sites under my custom domain. most proxies were blocked and i had to quit.

its special for the weather here in these years. maybe the soil erode heavily in neighbor province, Inner Mongolia. God know where the global climate leads the world to.

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rain day

last night i slept sound, under God's mercy. the night before yesterday i sleepless, but finally slept after mid night. God's calling me and i want to keep alert but the over anxious preventing me sleep. i want live in sound and see God's set among people, His creature, in calm mood. in the last 4 times before fell into the trap of asylum, i acted upon adversity around my baby and my Royal correctly and dramatic changes in my behavior led me disaster ruin of my opposing the evil's shadow on me. i now my Royal stepping to the palace was unchangeable, and God choose us led China to belief and self-esteem, no one can change it, but i in the process to form it and i had been called by God to act for 4 times. now i m more or less familiar with God's message and shine on me and i shouldn't in a panic as usual. i m in uncomparable glad and should less repulsive to envies and ill wills. i only need to stay in peace with God's message and help heal others, the population of my empire.

its a gloomy day. rain likely launched last night. yesterday baby was held by the grandma alone to the hospital. i blamed ema to risk baby's happy mood, but she can't refuse her mother's suggestion. the evil old woman likely tried all her means to upset my baby and my baby asked to play outside just returning home from the hospital. till work time over he didn't return home. he looks in fatigue when i received at home and he asked for sleep immediately. but he didn't slept, instead he played with ema's pupils staying our home to be tutored. after all no one can move a single hair of him without our consent under God's guide. i love him so painfully, for i know he suffering the pains of growth as much as mine. God let all gone with wind, but immortal love just let me more painful.

its a nice rain. i always welcome it as bliss. it clean the dirty and forgive the wrong doing of souls in shadow. i love the heaven, or in simple word, the sky and universe, and the day or time. God, save me from ruin of defense, let me know that all my cares in ur attending. i love u. baby, i love u.

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Sunday, May 25, 2008

a peaceful sunny morning

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yesterday was a busy day. in the morning and early afternoon i busy with registering mirror sites of warren's and mine sites or group we already had with google sites which recently launched open. dog of China surveillance blocked me and stolen 3 domain of warren, ie., warrentzh, wardzh and warwinzh, and i had to add suffix of 21, standing for 21 century, and finished them. then ema summon baby to visit hospital. baby miserably repeated he don't want injection. i just finished my work and felt painful on my right wrest, so i suggest i went to hospital to accompany baby. then we, including the grandma, launched. we took taxi arriving there. its a Chinese medical hospital and children treating occupied large portion of its operation. baby first was asked to open his mouth to pick sample from his throat to test if infected there for constant heat. baby cried and refused immediately. then ema asked me to buy some food for baby and i left. after i returned the sample was taken and soon the prescription was offered. i was assigned to paid and fetch medicine. then the grandma amd me let baby enema. a nurse called baby's name and started. baby cried not to accepted and the grandma forced baby to receive. baby enjoyed the potato chips i just bought and then we moved to a room crowd of sick babies and their parents to prepare for receiving injection.i had to co-use a bed with a very fat woman with her baby. the neighbor bed separating with an lane was sleeping a man with his sleeping baby. i sat beside the sleeping men and the grandma asd beside baby almost facing me. soon i want to urine and i left. then a bed near the door was emptied and we took. i found baby irregular and i guess someone in the environment threatening him. so i picked a chair and sat near baby and facing him. baby relaxed a little but the grandma sad aside with a leg facing me constant stolen my energy. i almost got outpour but she finally left and for a long time stay outside of the room. i on the chair wondering a lot, including my being brought to my hometown. the parents there in the room competed each other and lots of funs. i again know God's setting there and used hard my brain. ema later busy with chatting with baby who just want to leave before the injection treatment finished. baby bleed a litter after injection finished and we waited for bleeding stop and we took a taxi for home again.

from now on i know the grandma and the uncle stealing from me and my family. in the night on bed i almost can't sleep and felt baby's situation, ie., heat on body and sleeplessness. i reviewed God's calling me 4 times to fight with nothing less but the asylum and my mercy with baby and trying to protect him. i almost worry my sleeplessness again haunted me, but i finally slept and sound till late morning. ema in the mid before i fell into sleep interactived with me. i don't know who is my enemies and what i should defense. i don't know which is true about how i can let baby better and more meaningful for me as a father.

it all gone now, with this specular peaceful morning light, morning sunshine. its just too peace to miss a blog. so i stroke here in front of my pc, which likely less attractive since now, for i will spare some time to wonder the God's manifest around me and respond if necessary. God, pl let me in ur shine, no matter where and how its hard to reach.

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