bright days, tour Longsha park on a day after lunar Qingming Day

praying dad and baby son

baby and his mom in hill towner.

these days r quite some bright days. also quite some colleagues tried to contact me, likely some good news on me attacked greedy eyes. i more or less still in urgency to search for my beloved, to rid my longing for change, and revitalized my life with oil and water or stream. today is the second day of vacation lunar Qingming Day, the first year with such a national holiday. yesterday i dozed a lot to avoid missing and rampant message about my concerns. this morning i again want to sleep to dream of my beloved, but baby son disagreed. his mother joined her school in morning. he can't find funs alone in pc games. i played awhile with him after he cried for being alone. devils around let he and me encountered barrage when we worked together. that's common these days, quite some occasions i was under anxious about baby's future character or personality, and his position in my Royal, with my other sons and daughters, baby's sisters and brothers, arriving. spying eyes turning thick since my Royal's growth.

soon baby's mother returned. she rushed to put on baby to join her girl friend, a fat woman in family name of Guan ( means in English gate, or cadre with the same Chinese syllabus), i asked to join but ema doubted if i will be a barrage. but baby son insisted my companion. i found they gathered in Longsha park, the biggest garden in Qiqihar. we took photos. baby rode on puppy elephant. we saw animals in its zoo. then we dined nearby. we r the first arrived the restaurant and ordered first. but an later arrived group took a seat near us took first dish and many other dishes they ordered, let us waiting and in want. they r likely dogs in revenge, but also can be the hatred family members, who at a lose upon my pride and glory when bride their sisters,  of my beloved. baby was unease with them and squadded in meals for many times. when we left, 3 girl also departing from a nearby restaurant. the guan soon left us to take her way and at once we felt better.

baby slept just after we left the bus. he slept on my shoulders when we went home. its a bright day so far. i sorted photos then also dozed. when i woke up, it turned gloomy. i know conspires against my Royal turns thick and haste. yesterday baby's kindergarten broke down. we had to find baby another kindergarten. but all after all, God seeing. He seeing and killing. that's rule the devils hated.

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bright days, longing for hometown

baby backview.

baby asked his mom to carry him.

these days all bright days. i felt most blessed by the Heaven. however, the lingering evil, the grandma, made cause of baby's cold, staying with baby at her daughter's home, left me restlessly. 2 days i in office felt urgent to return home to secure baby's health and found baby in deed under poisonous atmosphere brought by the grandma. today ema borrowed my notebook for her courseware. i lingered at home in the beginning of the morning against the grandma, who can lingered in the house and delaying baby joining his kindergarten, where i felt safer for baby for my beloved there caring baby now. after ema returned from her school to send baby to the kindergarten, i arrived my office. the devil in office still challenging me. i idled some time and even chatted with a pal in the male crowded office nearby. quite some of them gay oriented. i reviewed my love and my situation when i roamed in my office. then i got holy message that i should execute my schedule of future right now, ie. returned my hometown and enjoyed peace and leisure there right now. i at once heading to emakingir's house. the grandma returned and slept with baby in a quilt, even baby sweeping. the old ghost in cold well tried all means to closer to baby these days. i at once brought baby up and soon baby picked pc game, while the devil soon slept on the bed. i then brought baby outside to avoid the dirt in house. the sunshine all time bright today. i babbled a lot to baby about the demons in his mother's family, and discussed with baby if i can returned my hometown in the aim to reunite with my beloved, ie. Masheng youjizi, my second wife, my Queen in crown, with whom i will have at least 3 sons in her brilliant wits and brave, calm and firm, my most known and been known, and my Taiwan fiancee, the youngest girl in my Royal now, with whom i never lack passion and energy, and the zhou, the one who follows me the best. i got the message from sunshine and wind. but baby, warren zhu, God and hope of China, refused my request several times. finally we got our decision from the result of our bet of rock-paper-scissors.

today is my lucky day, for i decided to visit my hometown the sooner the better. i enjoyed my life on my home land and my passed dad right this moment and ditched of waiting and endure. Masheng and Taiwan girl from now on can arrange my house there. i should see it in one or 2 years.

9th snow in lunar 2009, shallowly, with message from my Taiwan fiancee

the nearby Elders' center of emakingir's house, under 9th snow in lunar 2009.

the gloomy day, except bright clouds in other side of the sky.

last Friday a neighbor colleague yelled in office that next day would snow according weather forecast, but i didn't take for granted. then yesterday was bright day, with bright sunshine most of the day. i dozed a lot in the morning to escape from message about my youngest beloved, a slim and tall young girl with Taiwan backgroud. we totally met twice in the street near baby's mother's school. the first time she bought snack alone in a nearby shop, the second time when i just cared my baby when she walked with a large bag with a girl pal. each time i was dumbfound as her beauty and age-can't-bringing cunning beams. in the most distressed moment in my hometown when i just arrived a night, on a dawn, i told the sprite in the Forrest on the mountain on my arrangement, i let her to visit me and stay at any moment she likes for any length of time she enjoys with me, and research what she likes, esp. about the wrecked. i arranged she to entertain me most, with her untouchable perfection of beauty and youth. i cherish her with my most tendering and love of beauty.

the morning i slept a lot to avoid dwelling too much about her, for i didn't expect our reunion so soon. after woke up, i missed in thoughts about her, and got view she now in urgency to live with me and enjoy being my hostess. i saw lots of attempts she managed to inform me anonymously, urging me to take action to farewell to my current status. i was full of longing and passion with the life ahead, and adopted the message from holy on how to make full pleasure with her, who is so young and mature. all the afternoon i restlessly, can't find anything interesting, except her, the Taiwan girl. on the end of the night, i decided to listen to God, trust me life with his setting, and do what i can and enjoy now.

the night ema again urged to sleep early and left less quilt for me, with baby and she took most of the quilt. her body usually very hot, and these days esp. hot. last night i can't bear the heat and slept less. so this night i later decided to sleep alone in another quilt. i slept sound this morning. after i got up, i found a shallow snow already covered the most of the earth. its another white tale to assure me that my fiancees all secured and divined against dirt and dark. what i need do is just here calling ur floral names and praying the wedding day sooner and brighter. our union is inscribed in Heaven.

update: now its turned into a drizzle, with the soil shallow wet, like Chinese traditional poem has it, spring rain scarce like oil. i really really love the rain day and what it brings me the shallow sorrow, a life memory shaped in my hometown, Central China, where rain plenty.

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8th snow in Qiqihar, China, in lunar 2009, turne bright sunny after late noon

yesterday almost a tiny sunny day. the Internet access via lan proxy all down, likely the switch or router on nearest join point disconnect my wire. and my sites, including homepage on google pages ( http://www.be21zh.org ) and on my domain registrar godaddy ( http://be21zh.org ), my blogs on blogger ( http://benzillar.blogspot.com or http://songdod.blogspot.com ), my google app engines on appspot ( http://forum.be21zh.org or http://app21zh.appspot.com ), my google apps sites under my custom domain mapping ( http://zhuson.be21zh.org or http://wiki.be21zh.org ), all down and inaccessible when i tried to test them on an office pc when its user absent. the dog in China surveillance really hurt, since my repolishing my homepage on google pages and godaddy, after seeing their layout mythterously messy on Monday this week. dog blocked my correcting operation on godaddy the afternoon before yesterday sweatily, just when i doing editing the page. surely they smelled denotation in my posts online.

yesterday in office i mostly reading ebook, on Christian and wealth source of modern society. i also dozed and deep. i dreamed of my once girl friend, a Liu, and her mother. but ema, my baby's mother, seemingly merged with the Liu. the relation in dream on the rim of broken, but we tried to keep it. returning home after work, i found ema reconciled with me after last night i scorn her insistence to force baby having pills in 2 hours, and told baby the truth of his mom. later she told me the broadband access is extended and ready, after she adopt the service from one of her colleague who want to ditch hers, leaving 12 months available to migrate to my account, at a favorable cost of ￥400. but login has problem. after a buzz into the telcom help desk, i was connected to Internet again at home, but my sites blocked by cop don't leave blank or errs page as before, but tentatively shown on page saying the sites was filtered by the authority of surveillance. later returning page from google saying the sites unavailable or untrusted, etc. dog in China surveillance surely took actions just the night before yesterday. God laughs in their terrors. 

last night my family life is ok, baby enjoyed playing pc game with me, while ema again persuade baby having pills and i rebuffed once, except the dirty conspire over my new broadband service, and my web activities in closer surveillance. i had the sense of a new snow in the night, and it did in the night. this morning after i got up, i watched out at once and found a shallow snow covering the earth. i know that's Masheng's great gift from Japan, also Gift of Jamie from America. the white story tells me that my beloved all genius and saint and clear&clean like dews, just like God promised me. i love u, all my fiancees. 

this post is the first one under more crucial surveillance of China. i can't see it on my blogs on blogger.com, i can't see most of my sites several days ago accessible. i can only rely on my email posting and check it in my google reader's rss subscriptions. God sees my beloved shares my gossip with them here, like any spirit God conveys, in any tiny matters or inconceivable trifle phenomenon or pulse.  God win me u all. that's it.

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