summer 2016 after chills arrives.

Jun 20, 2016

dreamt in our family's cabin. we had a party, inc my niece and guest girls. then a guy spied us and joined our shuttercock game. we together beat the guy till he confessed his role. its late night, then we found in another room of the cabin, my niece lonely slept and fears darkness. then we sorry and visited her as companions. we competed with poems, including my nephews, for the peaceful night. yesterday I had good time with my son. since last week I warned him pedophobia he now loathed to hear my babbles, for my warn likely put his mightiness in constrain. but he is so selfless and soon accepted my companion again. I fed him with his favorite Chinese franchise restaurant, Seejoys dunplings, where I only have less than ￥50 in purse and constantly afraid of can't pay our bill there. next day, Sunday we dined Japanese cuisine whose bill paid by our subscription digitally. after shower I escorted him all the afternoon now that his mom not at home, till the grandma prepared supper. I complained boring after we tried video games and waiting for downloading. then I massaged woz, whose neck and back under heavy usage in his frequent android gaming and my concern to keep its resilient. my son more or less enjoys it. after that I tried ice bag we recently ordered online for cooling our legacy game notebook and works perfect, we applied it on woz's neck, head. later he wrote awhile his homework and I continued trying to sell the ice treatment. after returned to dorm, I busy restored my os which damaged by China surveillance, first time it tentatively disabled my vpn and forced me rebuilding it. the iron curtain previously constantly broke in but maintained my world web accessible. but they never gave up blocking my son browsing western video websites. God, dad, grant my son richer entertainment, esp overseas movies and TVs. forever win us broader access of world democracy and its media, esp google and twitter, etc, to ensure our source of sound news and judgement. help me cope my credit crisis with triumph, help my cyberspace startup succeeds.

Jun 18, 2016

yesterday dreamt snakes everywhere around me. this dawn dreamt borrow books from my 2nd elder brother and sister. then found in a month I will graduate and without job. so I go to Lhasa to work. but there my nephew, ie. first son of my 2nd elder sister and his son and other relatives electronic sucked and lots of panic, including some of evilous students I found from those paid my son's mom to receive her tuition at her house when I visited son. at last I tried to rescue my relatives and entered the electrified room, consulted nearby kids about safe spots, jumped and trying to reach lever to cut down leaking power then woke up. this week a bit busy, upgrading my son's intel nuc with new and larger ssd bought by my supportive credit card from PSBC even in credit crisis. China surveillance heavily attacked me when I prepare clean OS and backup on it. they desperate broke the minipc and blocked my son from enjoy American movies and videos through VPN I prepared. each time within a week after my clean built they ruin the encrypted tunnel, make youtube and amazon video inaccessible. and this month my once and long time employer, QRRS, likely busier with orders. my purse almost empty but now new salary would improve it and better. credit card issuer bank buzzed but now we are more polite, except PSBC didn't call in so far, on air. and some of them threatened shift me to its law enforcement department but yet happened. but the dorm canteen operator who lent me boarding before my promised pay, turns complainful. last night a heavy rain loudly sang when I bought dine out groupon by PSBC credit online. its just so blessing, so I dropped my son a phone even I doubt if its too late around 9pm. but he is agile to pick the phone, as holy affirmed. this noon I will reunite him in champion of new availability of entertainment. God, dad, bring me sooner my Royal China to host my family. bring lifestyle we enjoyed so far. help me alleviate credit crisis in this month salary. grant us happy weekends every week.

Jun 10, 2016

dreamt in campus with my Nankai Univ alumni again in practice lesson. I lost track when team launched. on half way I met some kids, I rewarded some coins to a smart boy. when I caught up with the team, they were leaving. I confused why these physics lessons so hard to learn and discussed my problem with others, like ballistic track, pounding force, etc. some of my alumni told me and I gradually grasped it, for human have right to know what's going on in their life. so science sometimes knows as curious as fun, doesn't always mean to change courses, to fix something, but it tells truth even boring truth. I met lots of classmates including girls when I arrived the camp. on farewell party I suggested a toast and lots of biddings echo from my classmates then I woke up. a rain in dawn turns clear even in my dream. its a mid size rain, raindrops make happy rhythm like my hometown central China summer rains. last night I first intended to suffer starvation with the only noodle meal, for my only have 30rmb in purse. near 9pm, hunger let me blue, I tried to shift focus from it but failed. then I gave in and intended to watch and dine out my son today, for according PRC calendar the Sunday will be a workday. I will have to shower on Saturday rather than usual Sunday lest my son has no vacation to do it for schooling. then I relieved and ate a candy I prepared for my son's visit. later hunger even urgent and I had to cost ￥5 for a street vendor snack nearby in the night. God, dad, when is we in no want? when our enjoyed lifestyle makes us heartedly settled? bring me sooner my Royal China to host my guests and under Holy glory of plenty we cheer up. grant me my cyber startup booming and credit as safe and likes a breeze.

Jun 9, 2016

lunar dragon boat day holiday slides in before my notice. this morning missed canteen breakfast among dreams and naps in early wakeup, or the dorm canteen already closed service in holiday like usual. in boring morning I felt all world pales out in others' celebration, left me alone and lonely. I felt cold and napped in quilt for warmth. near noon I ate noodles in nearby restaurant after found canteen out of service. the sunshine is faultlessly bright, but it a bit too stinging for sunbath. I missed my son very much but decided follow Christian calendar to reunite him in weekends, ie day after yesterday, and for the sake of my poor wallet, which left no more than ￥30. this week my credit card issuer bank buzzed several times, and I promised CCB whose clearance clerk woman quite sincere that I will pay it first with this month salary. bankcomm confirmed my unable to pay in time more than 3 times, likely will adopt next phrase operation to secure its property. PSBC still helping me with its credit, allowing me to buy what I need, like SSD harddisk and other item online, but its clearance clerk man too coarse to handle, just cursed me times and times likely repulses me with disgusting or maltreatment. in the afternoon I napped again to avoid boringness, I dreamt my shared workplace visited by 2 pals of my colleague, likely one of my Nankai Univ alumnus now lives in Canada, or the youngest son of my uncle, who both tall and bigger build. they invited me to name their company and trying using office computer to find solution. I was a bit afraid them using my computer, so I tried in mess and harsh to logout my computer but can't find keyboard in piles of paperworks prompt. then I suddenly shout out my answer, Tian'an in Chinese, totally safe or heavenly safe. my alumnus approached me to cheer up before I woke up. its sunny now outside. with classic music rather than podcast recently I listened more on google play I felt in right mood under bliss. God, dad, my income shortage now weights me down. I saw in decades my earnings from my blog and websites hardly supports lifestyle we enjoyed so far including my son since powered by credit card. dad, God, only your Mightiness covers our incomplete of life support. grant us freedom of financial independence. bring me sooner my Royal China to sustain the brilliant way ahead. boost my web presence and traffic that means. catalyze my cyberspace startup to success. dad, I'm so complacent with my web assets. secure them and let it deserve our effort to bring it out.

Jun 3, 2016

in dawn dream reviewed my passed mother helped my aunt's last child with her 2nd husband preparing his wedding ceremony. I regarded the 2nd husband humiliated my dad and hostile toward my dad and our family's success. but my mother always tried her best shown her hospitality to the man and my uncle who admired her. my mother likely hurt my dad much with her charm unselective and spare no expense. I was asked to join the wedding ceremony in my summer vacation and according customs carried bride's gift to fiance's family with other young relatives in our old family. on way a steep wet slope a heavy truck almost can't brake itself and dangerously slip downward and almost brought me down. I narrowly escaped the truck with load of gifts and many years after I thought its a holy salvage. the marriage didn't last 3 years and the wife left. my mother just can't trust her husband and fought with all her resources in her interest. then dreamt I made 3 portable devices for data mobility. the design so effective that I intended to shift to my son. this week began with idling then gradually engaged. yahoo informed me to logon to keep account active. when logon it require verification from backup mailbox, ie. google account. in the process quite some of zhone google accounts suspended for suspicious activities, likely PRC backed hacking. I tried several means to report to google, which likely doesn't support human individual handling, but machinary rules. but 3 days later, last night my accounts unlocked and I rearranged them as planned. its such champion like a breeze, I sang for the heroic giant public company. this week my credit card issuer bank buzzed 3 or more occasions, we agreed to shift my unable to pay back to next phrase, even I don't know what will be. my youngest elder sister offered me ￥500 and I used it for weekend reuniting my son, ie. dining out, and my medicine. I also tried to reach out to my teenage friend, now works in college, but in vain. the teacher felt guilty upon his empty hand and tried to assign me in some agenda to whitewash remnant of his redemption. God, dad, life here runs deeper now. let's enjoy peace of everyday. bring me sooner my Royal China to host my guests. bring me glory of Son. grant me independent finance in my startup. thx for the descending summer heat.